This Drifting Poo Was Way Too Meaningful! It's the Television Disappointments of the Year.

Looking back, we reflect on the TV offerings of the recent year, a selection of shows emerge not for their excellence, but for their spectacular failures. Ranging from awkward spin-offs to bafflingly poor documentaries, here are the programmes that had us utterly bewildered or simply reaching for the remote.

And Just Like That

How to start with this love/hate spin-off? Plagued with dreadful writing, painful arcs (we demand better for Miranda!), and a mere 71 seconds of fan-favourite Samantha, the series struggled to justify its existence. Briefly, as the third season began, it looked like it had finally found its groove. Then came an installment centered on Seema’s natural deodorant. No wonder the showrunner declared this would be the final series. It ended on a bum note; the lingering shot of Miranda’s loo flooded with poo was simply too on-the-nose. Yet, fans undeniably found joy dissecting every single “wtf?” episode. And as Carrie – once again single – twirled around her palatial townhouse to Barry White, who didn’t let out a little sob?

The Kim Kardashian Drama

‘Is Kim Kardashian an actress? Of course she can’t.’

But that was almost the least of this show's problems. The recipient of a very rare zero star review, it was hard to know where to start enumerating the flaws. The laughably wooden dialogue? The tedious glorification of affluence and materialism? The almost deliberate procession of cliches? Performances so bad they felt borderline malicious? Let’s just say “all of the above” and forget about this show again. Except, a new season has been commissioned, so we’re probably going to have to.

The Charlie Sheen Documentary

Considering the legal troubles, domestic violence allegations and parental shortcomings, it’s reasonable to say Charlie Sheen has been a bad boy. Not you’d truly have gleaned it from this three-part documentary which chuckled along at Sheen’s various episodes of self-destructive hedonism while failing to tell us anything we didn’t already know. Instead, it felt as if this loose cannon was being indulged, so any sympathy this show might evoke should be reserved for the people who have had to endure proximity with this charming but dismissive narcissist.

The Supercomputer Drama

Naturally we knew it was preposterous from the get-go: a thriller about a supercomputer known as Charlie Big Potatoes that could either solve global crises – or annihilate all of humanity. We stuck with it out of pure admiration for its stars … but by the end, it felt like even they had stopped bothering. One barely cared when his character died, and the other ultimately hacking Charlie with an axe … in painfully slow-motion. That's what you call admitting defeat.

The Gangster Drama

Dodgy characters meeting in deserted boxing gyms? The Prodigy’s Firestarter blaring in club scenes? The late 90s called and wants its crime drama back.

In truth, that is unfair on the crime shows of the late 90s. Many look a little dated now, but at least they didn’t endure the embarrassment of having to indulge unconvincing accents. But there were plenty of other issues. Primarily that it was just really boring; a dispute over drug-selling territory between various London rogues which seemed rather simplistic.

The Meghan Markle Series

Given the extent to which she provokes the ire of the nation’s performatively angry commentators, it’s temptingly tempting to admire the Duchess of Sussex’s televised forays into twee lifestyle as intentional provocations. But then you view them and are compelled to concede that in this case, they may have a point. It’s like watching a lifestyle catalogue animated; a meme for evening drinks with ideas of grandeur; a parade of sleeping dogs, buzzing beehives, Hallmark sayings and pointless crafting “tips” you’ll forget instantly. All underpinned by vast, mostly undeserved wealth. Ugh.

The Beckham Documentary

There are clearly interesting things to be said about both Victoria Beckham and her struggles with career, self-image, self-acceptance. But for whatever reason, this documentary series opted not to explore them. Instead, the experience was akin to reading a marketing catalogue. She obviously has good reason to resent what she describes as her “miserable cow” image. But sadly, she failed to do herself any favours with this guarded non-event of a series.

The Game Show

It had the potential to be the next big hit – except even more extravagant, with a famous star as a deceased benefactor and a sharp-tongued personality managing her estate. What more could you want? As contestants battled it out, there was plenty of betrayal and squabbling. But the rules quickly became bewildering: it’s still too complicated to explain what precisely was happening. Even more disappointingly, we only saw brief appearances of the star via prerecorded videos. The series ended up smelling of a programme that was trying way too hard to emulate something far greater than it.

The Lena Dunham Romcom

How do you succeed a show that defined a generation? The pressure was immense for this starry romcom about Jessica, a rosy-eyed New Yorker who lands in London with a shattered romance. The star seized the opportunity by the horns and was a delight to watch, reveling in Austen levels of romantic notions. But it was all very slick and, ironically, was not enough. Plus, the abundance of famous cameos involved felt uncomfortable.

The Sketch Show Return

Not good enough to be ‘uneven’.

Given the shrewd recruitment of talented emerging comics, hopes were high. But sadly, most of it didn’t land. A particular sketch was a one-note joke stretched to a husk but repeated in every episode. One star seemed too willing to slip into a well-known ranting mode. The behind-the-scenes sketches, meanwhile, simply provoked the thought that they should probably have remained in there a bit longer.

The Knox Dramatisation

This dramatisation of the story of Amanda Knox was executive produced by Amanda Knox and pretty much exclusively showcased the viewpoint of Amanda Knox. So, while there undoubtedly is an interesting drama to be made about the tragic 2007 murder, this was not it. The material needed to be treated with care. Rather, the series laboured awkwardly to find the right tone, lurching from strangely jaunty, somewhat mannered farce to ultimately, real-life horror. Complex? Arguably. A total mess? Absolutely.

Prime Target

We love the star … but did we buy him playing the greatest maths genius since, a man so intelligent he’s on the verge of a discovery that could ruin society? No! This international thriller about secret services targeting – and eliminating – academics honestly got more absurd by the second. Silliness-by-numbers.

1000 Men and Me: The Bonnie Blue Story

This hagiography followed the online personality notorious for sexual exploits as she prepared for her most extreme challenge yet. What on earth would possess her? What we wanted was far greater interrogation of her actual psyche, plus those of the men in the queue. They could at least have interviewed the legendary mum who showed up to drag her son away from the queue. What we got was disturbing imagery and zero interrogation of her notoriety whatsoever. It's staggering to consider, the documentary-maker has a teenage daughter too.